Friday, April 1, 2011

The Voices in My Head...................

I have been reading a few different blogs lately, that are all about loving yourself now and how to embrace life as you are now, not where you hope to be.................

They are all great and talk alot about positive thoughts and sayings and changing the negative voices in your head!

But the more I read and the more I  thought about what they were saying the more I realised that I don't talk badly to myself, I don't sit there telling myself what a miserable, fat blob you are for eating those biscuits, or I don't deserve to be happy because I am overweight or anything remotely similar.

When I eat something bad, there is actually no voices in my head saying nasty things - just "Oh well - what else!" - I am truly beginning to discover I am an emotional eater - mainly boredom.

What I do, do thought is play over conversations in my head and how they should have gone or what I want to say to someone if I had the courage.

I also replay events/moments when I have said something stupid and think why did I say that (and it can be from years ago) and replay it with what I should have said.

I worry about what that person is now thinking of me and is it affecting how they deal with me now.

A recent example is a situation at work with a co-worker who I challenged (nicely) in a conversation and she has stopped talking to me.
I have played the conversation over and over again - then thought about what would happen if I confronted her about the non-talking which leads me to recall things I have told her in the past that she may bring up which will alter the whole conversation and bring it back to me being the one in the wrong - and so I won't say anything at all!

Whew  - that makes me tired just typing it!

So - I guess what I need to do is try and let some things go...........................

What about you? or am I the only one going crazy???

1 comment:

Hannah Houshangi said...

Replaying conversations in my head and over thinking everything said is one of my weaknesses. So I feel you on that. You're not the only one. I try not to do it but I can't help it!